Hiyam: The parents don’t want the female kids to come to the centre anymore because they have grown up. It’s forbidden because there are boys here, for example. Or boys, when they see there are a lot of girls here, they leave, they don’t want to be in a group where it’s all girls. But if there are activities that put women and men together, and they have something interesting, the boys won’t come if they are feeling bored, there are things that deal with their identity, their skills, their talents, that is being worked on, those men will come. This place also has to keep its trust with the community because if it doesn’t have trust, these kids will go away.
One of the challenges, for example is that boys like to do dabke. Let’s talk about dabke, when the boys wanted to do dabke before, it was forbidden for there to be girls around on stage. This was a problem, so we talked to the parents, we talked to the father, we talked to the mother, we told them that this is something cultural/traditional, it expresses identity, it’s very good, it gives them self-confidence, people see them and get happy for them, and you will be happy. So, when the parents saw them on stage for the first time, they were very proud, after some time, it was allowed for them to hold each other’s hands. They were seen as dancing and that it gave it a good look to hold each other’s hands. And it gave a good image, the image that wasn’t allowed became allowed, through something the kids loved and the community loves.
Many times, through for example, drama, they act, they act about for example, the teachers and their way of teaching. Sometimes the teachers, this is one of the issues that the students suffer from, they go through oppression in the class, that they cannot express their opinions, but through drama and showcasing it in front of students and teachers, there is criticism on how the teacher behaves with the student and …the teacher themselves start thinking about how they’re acting and the other students gain confidence, that they can do this too, express the wrongdoings, that they don’t have to keep silent on mistreatment, that there are many things that they can do, they can argue but they can also see the positive sides of it.
Gradually, there is change. The issue of gender, that the girls and boys, that girls work this way and boys work that way. We once made an event where we showed a girl and boy, we sealed their lips with cloth, they can’t talk, and we had a list of tasks, what a woman can’t do and a man can’t do, the girl was filled with papers on what she can’t do. The boy, he had less papers. And then, there was a discussion on this. One of the things that came out of the discussion, is that the boy said, why can’t the girl and I not talk and then there was a discussion on these tasks. Since the boy and girl got to talk, the tasks became different. Gradually, the more there was discussion, people’s minds changed and there was a change in community. Emotionally they were influenced by the task, so there was a change.
The idea was, change doesn’t have to look a certain way, but if you put a girl or boy in certain situations they never were put under, you give them a chance to think about it. You give him a chance to experience something he never saw. Or he never discussed. Or he never experienced. In this way, change happens. You allow for an introduction to occur. And with gradual work, change occurs.
[Starts talking in English] Did you understand what I’m talking about? I’m talking about the gender, we make like an activity. It was, we bring a boy and a girl, we put something, we close their, it wasn’t allowed for them to talk, so we put something here on their mouth, and they put a lot of tasks that are not allowed for the girl, for the boy, and everybody choose from these tasks and put on them so the girl was full of…
Off camera man: sticky notes.
Hiyam: Sticky notes, that she’s not allowed to do this and this and this and this and this and the boy was also but not…
Emily Wills: And his were different.
Hiyam: Yeah and in this case there was a discussion, first of all, I mean, we discussed them what there was their feeling while we judged them without being able to talk and it was really difficult for them for the boy and the girl, oh they were doing .. putting stickers giving us tasks or judging us without giving us the opportunity even to talk. This was one. And also, to discuss why she was full of all these uh …
Off camera man: stickers.
Hiyam: Yes and he was in a way…In a way, we expose them to what is happening with them in society and how they feel and is it accepted or not because sometimes, the girls even, they accept what is happening to them. I mean “they are not allowed to this, you are not allowed to do this” and she accept. So in this situation she can feel and even the boys can feel, and everybody was talking and discussing.
